Friendship, Fear (Or Lack Thereof): The Adventures of the Great Lord

Loooooonnnggggg one… I thought I was good at writing fictional stuff, but man it’s tough. I ended up ranting a lot. Oops.

Don’t know what person is going to read this whole thing, but… Enjoy. This was my final project for my writing course.

Also, the title sounds ridiculous, but I tried to make it connect to the story and the books…


“But at the beginning of the following summer, as he was on his march towards Rome and was beginning to pass the Alps, he had news brought him that his nephew Modred, to whose care he had entrusted Britain, had by tyrannical and treasonable practices set the crown upon his own head; and that queen Guanhumara, in violation of her first marriage, had wickedly married him.” (History of the Kings of Britain, Geoffrey of Monmouth)

Colton stared at the page, the words gradually being digested into his head. It was definitely time for a break. Some good reading was accomplished. This is what he called quality time spent well.

Standing up, he closed the book, placing it lightly on the couch.

What to do, now? Work didn’t start for another two hours. It wasn’t abnormal for Colton to find himself scavenging for something new, something interesting to do at the manor. He has moved furniture around too many times to count—yes, he does this himself—and he has explored the house so many times he could point out every miniscule flaw. Ever since Father died, Colton has found himself constantly reshuffling items, never satisfied. To his disgust, he continued to think back on Father’s layout, and how beautifully crafted it was.

No—it was a horror.

Perhaps a simple walk is good enough for me, Colton thought, shaking his head. He grabbed the keys to his quarters and proceeded forward, fixing his shirt collar before shutting the door behind him.

~

The walk served its intended purpose. He took note of several things: fixing some of the lights in the grand library, polishing the two candlesticks in the back of the dining hall, perhaps bringing in some new china…

Several workers also passed him by, huffing and puffing, each one looking rather exhausted. Each one, he asked if they were doing quite all right. They were doing spectacularly, each one said. Colton couldn’t help but notice that each one carefully looked anywhere that was not in his eyes, and that each one’s hands were trembling as they stood before him.

Of course, that was unsurprising.

As Colton was ruminating about these workers and how they pointedly avoided him, a door swung open to his left. Startled, he paused in his steps. He’d been so engrossed in his thoughts that he hadn’t realized he’d arrived to his sister’s quarters.

Celia looked twenty times as shocked as Colton, her eyes wide as a doe’s, her mouth hanging open. Or perhaps she was just much more expressive.

“You’ll catch flies, Sister.” Colton stated.

Her mouth snapped shut, before curling into a small, sly smile. “Why hello there, Brother. I’m pretty good, thanks for not asking. Come to see me, have you?”

“I didn’t think I was, actually,” he said. “But now I suppose so.”

If Celia’s smile would widen any more, it would split her face in two. She looks so much like Mother, he thought. An exact copy. It’s no wonder everyone takes to her. Somehow, though, she shone more brilliant than Mother, Celia a diamond and Mother merely a pearl.

Then, abruptly, her face fell. Beckoning Colton into the room, she told him they needed to talk. This was rather puzzling; it was rare for Celia to sound so serious. He followed her into the sitting room, and she motioned for him to sit.

“So, Brother,” she began, voice just barely catching. There was a silence. It affected neither sibling; silence was common among the two.

“So, Brother,” she tried again. “Before we have our deep, soulful talk, would you care for some proper builders tea? I know it’s your favorite!” She emphasized the last word, and then skipped out of the room, humming to herself and darting a wink at Colton.

He sighed. This was going to take a while.

~

“No.” The word rang out, loud and clear, echoing in the white silence of the sitting room. Strangely enough, this new silence made Colton a bit uncomfortable. It swam with tension.

“But—”

Colton shook his head, letting a hint of a sad grimace creep onto his face. “I’m sorry, Sister, but I must decline. This way, it will be better for both of us.”

The idea was absurd. Introduce him to her circle of friends? They were her friends, not his. Besides, Celia talked about them day and night; two of them work with her at Juicy Juice, and her boyfriend was some type she met at school. Colton essentially knew them already, so there was no need to meet them face-to-face.

Most importantly, however, he knew they would react the same way as everyone else he has ever encountered. Fear, creeping into their eyes, though they tried to conceal it. Dread, at having to face the spawn of a monster—it didn’t help that Colton looked identical to Father. Pain, knowing who this boy was. Oh, he was just like Father.

Celia was different. He made her swear, four years ago upon Father’s death, to tell no one who her family was. He made her recite, over and over again, who her new family was, down to the finest hair. To this day, she is known as the darling orphan girl who lives with her grandmother, whose older brother has departed on his travels.

“No, it won’t!” Celia insisted. “I want them to know who you are. They’re my friends, and they deserve to know the truth. You’re my brother, and you deserve to live a beautiful life—you’re 19, for goodness’ sake!—not one cramped up like you are in the manor.”

She was too noble for her own good.

Colton stood up, fixing a crinkle on his dress shirt. “I must pass, Sister. You know I want only the best for you, and this is the best.” He made to leave, stepping one foot forward.

“You know what, Brother?” Celia’s voice was quiet, too quiet, hardly a whisper. “I don’t think you do, actually. If you wanted the best for me, you’d do more for me. You don’t know what I do for you. I lie for you, every day. And every time, it hurts me a little more. If I could just tell the truth, I could probably live a decade longer. But for you, Brother, I keep our secret quiet.”

He didn’t turn around, yet he could feel Celia’s eyes boring holes into his back, could hear the disappointment screaming in her voice, could visualize her stiff, straight-backed sitting posture she used when she was angry.

“Only because you refuse to let it go. Why can’t you let it go? He’s dead, and you’re not him. You’re just too scared of becoming like him, but the more you think you’re becoming him, the more you will turn out to be like him. You have it in you to be good, you know, Brother. You know what—What our brother would say? He would—”

Colton whirled around, icy eyes piercing her so that she cringed the smallest amount. “You do not tell me what Cyrus would say,” he said, voice flat. “He is gone and dead, murdered by our dear father, and he will not be saying anything evermore. So you do not go and act like his spokeswoman.”

There was stillness, the air churning. One could almost see sparks flying. Celia smiled, a smile that reached nowhere near her striking eyes—oh, were they striking, drowning in hurt and disappointment—and pointed to the door.

“Out. Now.”

~

Celia had not spoken to him for days. In return, Colton had not bothered to speak to her either. He could not believe she introduced Cyrus in a conversation. Cyrus was dead. And Colton was turning into the man who killed him. What a disgrace. More than a disgrace, actually. What a nightmare.

Sometimes, he wished that Cyrus were alive; he would be able to fix Colton up, would be able to make him into a good man, a man like Cyrus himself. But Colton would rethink, and he knew he would never, never in a trillion years, want Cyrus to see him in such a state. Shut in the manor all the time except when going to work, speaking to no one and creating fear in people’s lives.

Oh, Cyrus, he thought. What do I do?

~

A week passed since Celia last spoke to him, and Colton was beginning to get uneasy. She had never been resentful for so long; though stubborn, she always ended up seeing the beauty in people, swiftly forgiving them.

They rarely fought, but this was ridiculous. He, however, refused to speak to her first. He supposed they both end up getting the stubbornness from Mother.

~

One month. One month gone by, and not one word from Celia. This was definitely a new record—Colton hadn’t thought it possible she could go one month being angry with someone. He, on the other hand, was not faring too well. As irritating as she could be, Celia was his sister, and he needed her endless energy. She lived so much in the present that she was even slightly contagious.

Colton reached to insert an encyclopedia back into its rightful place on the shelf, but dropped it at the last second. It landed with a booming thump, startling nearly half the library. A couple of the visitors turned to glare at him, but upon noticing who it was, they went back to work, panicked.

Muttering a quiet apology, he wedged the book back into its spot.

A pair of footsteps came up to Colton from behind. He kept doing his thing, shoving books back onto the shelf, pretending he didn’t notice a thing.

“I know ya know I’m here,” a deep, raspy voice whispered. “Play dumbs all ya like, boy.”

Colton turned around, shaking his head in amusement. “I just can’t fool you, can I, Mister?”

It was Mr. Hahn, the head librarian in his early forties, who seemed to know everything. They met about three years ago. He was also the one man Colton has met that was not frightened of him at first glance; he could distinctly recall Mister’s first gruff words to him: “Tell me ya fav’rite book, boy, and we’ll see if I like ya!”

Hopefully, he liked Colton. Mister never did say.

Mister was a rough man on the exterior, but he was sincere, really wishing the best for the staff and visitors of the library. His love for books was well known and respected all around the city, and no one respected him more than Colton himself—according to Colton, at least.

“Why ya droppin’ my books, eh? This’s a first. I ain’t ever seen ya drop ’em precious covers before.” Mister eyed Colton, one of his bushy caterpillar eyebrows raised high.

Colton had the sense to look ashamed. “I’m very sorry, Mister. I don’t know what I was thinking, really.”

“No, s’alright.” Mister cracked a grin. “Jus’ wanted to bother ya. What y’up to? I’ve noticed yar not lookin’ too happy, recently. Don’ worry,” he continued, sensing what Colton was about to say, “No one’s noticed, jus’ me. I’m quite observant, ya see?”

It was true. As strict as Mister was, he seemed to notice every slight difference in mood, minor differences that most others would not discern. It was rather remarkable.

“Well, I have been thinking—”

“Dangerous, m’boy, dangerous,” Mister teased.

Colton gave him a look of exasperation. “I have been thinking about the notion of friendship—and the idea of getting to know people. What do you think about it? Do you perchance know of any previous examples in history? I know of…” He paused. “Gaius Julius Caesar and Marcus Junius Brutus, Gaius Julius Octavius and Marcus Vipsanius Agrippa…”

“Yes, yes, I know,” Mister interrupted, scowling. Temper was not a virtue of his. “Well, I can’t say I know much ‘bout it from experience, but, ah, say, I’ve some more rel’vant examples—around recent years, I mean—in lit’rature, like, ah, Sam an’ Frodo—the Lord o’ the Rings, that is—an’, ah, Tom Sawyer an’ Huck Finn…”

He stopped for a moment, tapping his fingers on the palm of his other hand. There were probably too many examples to count; naturally, Mister knew of all of them, and only needed to decide which were books Colton might like to read.

“… Nick Carraway an’ Jay Gatsby—a rather unique case, I s’pose—Sancho Panza an’ Don Quixote, ah, an’…”

At some point, Colton must have tuned out, thinking about all the studying he would have to do regarding friendship. Next thing he knew, Mister was gone. Colton blinked several times, turning around to see a stack of books on his book cart: the three Lord of the Rings novels, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, The Great Gatsby, and around ten more.

This was a challenge, but a challenge he was willing to undergo.

~

“But you’ve left out one of the chief characters; Samwise the stout hearted. ‘I want to hear more about Sam, dad. Why didn’t they put in more of his talk, dad? That’s what I like, it makes me laugh. And Frodo wouldn’t have got far without Sam, would he, dad?’ ” –Frodo Baggins (The Two Towers, J.R.R.Tolkien)

 

The trilogy was rather fascinating; Colton could not believe he had put off reading it for so long. However, he zoomed in on scenes with Frodo Baggins and his gardener Samwise Gamgee. Samwise was unbelievably loyal to Frodo, and while Frodo carried all the heavy baggage, Sam brought hope and light everywhere he went. He was a rather simpleminded person, but a true person nonetheless. Was this friendship, then? Being loyal and supporting each other?

“She said all a body would have to do there was to go around all day long with a harp and sing, forever and ever. So I didn’t think much of it. But I never said so. I asked her if she reckoned Tom Sawyer would go there, and she said not by a considerable sight. I was glad about that, because I wanted him and me to be together.” –Huck Finn (The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Mark Twain)

 

Colton was very much entertained by Thomas Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. They were very different people, with completely different lifestyles, yet they still managed to become friends. While not ‘best’ friends, their meeting each other was a very important part of their lives. Keeping this in mind, Colton realized that friendship was no small thing; it could change one’s life forever. That was an alarming prospect.

“‘They’re a rotten crowd,’ I shouted across the lawn. ‘You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.’” –Nick Carraway (The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald)

 

The Great Gatsby was a striking book. The relationship between Nick Carraway and Jay Gatsby could be called friendship, though based on Colton’s definition of friendship, it was quite a ways off. Nick admired Jay Gatsby very, very much, and was influenced greatly by the man. Colton thought that this book might not be exactly what he was looking for, though he understood that respect played a great role in a healthy friendship.

~

He finished all the books a few weeks later, with not one peep from Celia the entire time—quite a feat on her part. Now, however, it was time for some action. The mere thought of doing this sent a bead of sweat sliding down his face. That was unnerving.

Noon swung by, which was Colton’s cue to proceed. Taking his old, creaky Mustang, he left the manor, heading towards the city.

~

The bell chimed a high reedy sound as Colton stepped into Juicy Juice. He had put on a pair of jeans and a thick hoodie to conceal his white hair as much as possible. Immediately, the smell of pineapple and mango wafted towards him, nearly stuffing his nose. He was definitely not used to so much exotic fruit—he would have loved some fresh, aromatic builder’s tea.

The place was empty, not what Colton would have expected. It was a small shop, and made for buyers to purchase a drink then leave. He imagined it was founded just for busy people.

A voice called out “Welcome to Ju—” before sharply cutting off. Colton did not look towards the counter, instead deliberately examining the rows of pineapples and mangos lined up along the window, as if they were some special clearance item. Yet, somehow, he could see her smile sneak onto her face, threatening to invade. He could hear her next words ringing in his head, all joyful and filled with pride. He could feel her entire body loosen all at once, radiating happiness. It was as if she was never angry with him.

What had he gotten himself into?

“Celia? Earth to Celia? You alright?” another voice, a male voice, asked. “I dunno about you, but I think it’s kinda rude to stare. Welcome, though,” he said, directed towards Colton.

“Oh, yeah, oops. Thanks, Roy. Anyways, how may we help you, sir?” Celia heavily emphasized the sir, her gaze never leaving Colton’s back. “I do believe it’s your first time here, is it not? Would you like some recommendations?”

“How do you know it’s his first time here?” asked the boy named Roy. “You’re not here every day.”

Colton turned around. “She is right; It is my first time here. A recommendation would be nice, as well.”

The boy named Roy gaped, mouth hanging open. He’s absolutely ghastly at acting, Colton thought. He could have at least tried to keep his mouth closed. Colton observed the boy: around the same age as Colton, with choppy, untidy brown hair and a tall, delicate frame. While Colton disliked the lack of properness displayed by this Roy, the boy looked friendly enough, with large walnut eyes that held bottomless warmth and unerring hope.

“You’ll catch flies, Roy,” Celia stated, echoing Colton’s words from weeks ago.

His mouth snapped shut, before splitting into a wide grin. “Welcome, Lord Eider! The name’s Roy Kerr. I s’pose it’s your first time, like Celia said. Today, we’ve got some wicked specials; let’s see, um, there’s the Sunset, with grapefruit, beet, lime and ginger, and the Fire, with carrot, orange, lime and ginger. Dunno why there’s so much ginger. Personally, my favourite is the Forest. It’s got pear, kale, celery, cucumber and lemon. Uber healthy, right?”

It was rather overwhelming, and definitely not what Colton anticipated. Roy talked about thirty times too fast for the ears, and there were far too many ingredients in the juices. Nevertheless, he blurted out the only name he heard on the list: “Forest, please.”

“Good choice!” Roy bustled off to fix up the juice. “You won’t regret it!” he called back. Then, “Hey, Ed, wanna grab me some pears and a lemon? Thanks, mate!”

Colton stood there, unmoving, still processing Roy’s words. He noticed Celia’s eyes on him.

“Have you told them?” Colton asked, already knowing the answer.

Celia shook her head, biting her lip. “I don’t know how.” She typed a couple numbers into the cash register, then announced, “8 dollars, please.”

Roy’s voice came floating in from the back of the shop. “No need to charge him, Celia! It’s on me!”

Celia smirked, rolling her eyes. She muttered something under breath that sounded suspiciously like, “As if. Course I’ll charge him.”

Colton raised an eyebrow, not knowing how to respond. Turns out, he had no need to.

Roy came back, holding a deep red drink in his hand. It was blood red, making Colton’s stomach lurch. An image of a monster flashed in his mind. It is a mere drink, he told himself. Get over it.

“One Forest for you, milord!”

To Colton’s surprise, another boy came out from behind Roy. How many workers did one need in a miniscule shop like Juicy Juice?

This boy emitted a completely different aura than Roy—he looked to be the type that was friends with no one unless he chose to be, much like Colton. Narrow green eyes, like a serpent’s, with a graceful edge to his prowl. Colton had no idea who this boy was, but he instantly felt a crushing, intense sense of both like and dislike.

The boy’s eyes shot straight to Colton, drilling into him, making him wince a bit. How unusual. Was this the effect he had on others, making them uneasy? They glared at each other, steely eyes to serpent eyes, for barely a second.

“Oh!” Roy said, seeming to have forgotten something, or perhaps merely breaking the tension. “How silly of me. Lord Eider, this is Edward Thomas, and Edward, I s’pose you know who Lord Eider is. He got my favourite drink after I recommended it to him? Isn’t that slick?!”

Edward reluctantly removed his eyes from Colton as he said, “Yes, Roy, it is, as you’ve asked many times now.”

Colton’s brow furrowed faintly. That was rather impolite, he thought. However, just then, he noticed a small smile on Edward’s face. Ah. So they were friends, then—Edward was joking with Roy, not being rude. Glancing at Celia, Colton could tell she was amused as well. Under the delight, though, he noticed a layer of anxiety. It was probably to do with him; perhaps he should be the one to reveal the secret. He opened his mouth, and—

“So, Lord Eider,” Edward went on, smoothly. He was the epitome of grace… “Your sister has been working here quite a while. It’s quite good of you to finally show up.” … As well as sarcasm.

There was a long silence, with only the clock ticking in the background.

It was Roy who spoke up first. “Ah… I hadn’t noticed…”

To press him on, Colton stared at Edward. The boy didn’t falter, though he firmly avoided eye contact. Eventually, he continued: “I didn’t know, before. I noticed just now. You two are pretty different in looks, but family members will always have some similar traits, no matter how small.”

Celia glanced at Colton. Unexpectedly, he felt as if a great burden was lifted of his shoulders—perhaps he had been making Celia hide it for too long. Shame filled him. He swore to make it up to her. He would probably have to thank Edward for this, too.

“Celia! You didn’t have to hide him from us, we’re your friends.” Roy looked miffed.

Colton put a hand on Roy’s shoulder. “It was I. How about we take a seat? I have quite a few things to say regarding our circumstances…”

~

Colton’s first experience with potential friends went infinitely better than he had expected. They treated him so… Naturally. As a matter of fact, this experience struck him so much that he returned to Juicy Juice nearly every day.

As he got to know Roy better, he learned that Roy was, in fact, dreadfully terrified of Colton the first time they met. Perhaps the boy was better at acting than Colton initially gave him credit for. However, unlike most people, his sociable, helpful nature overpowered all of his fears. Colton felt vastly thankful for that. The boy was a little bit like Samwise Gamgee, simple but genuine, bringing light wherever he went. While not the type of person Colton could have ever imagined being friends with, it looked as if they were on a path to friendship, the two of them.

Colton was also introduced to Roy’s girlfriend and Celia’s best friend Riza Manning, who also worked at Juicy Juice. Prior to their encounter, he had already heard more than enough about this girl from Celia. So he knew quite a bit about her, which was odd. She was not particularly stunning, not in the way Celia was, but the girl had a quiet, natural beauty deep within her that Colton supposed only Roy could truly untangle. They were an unlikely pair, Roy and Riza; yet, if asked, Colton thought he might not be able to picture the two of them otherwise.

To Colton’s dismay, he was also forced (by none other than Celia) to become friends with her boyfriend, Hunter Barnett. He looked to be a very well bred boy, with an impressive hairstyle and a clean outfit, but never have looks been more deceiving. This Hunter was a nightmare of slang and horrifying manners, and unlike Roy, did not have the clumsy kindness to make up for it. Colton had absolutely no clue what his sister saw in this boy. He supposed he would have to deal with Hunter, though, for Celia’s sake. Perhaps one day, they would become the type of friends Thomas and Huckleberry were.

Edward was the one who most interested Colton. The boy was far too observant and spoke words far too close to the target for Colton’s liking. Nonetheless, Edward fascinated Colton. From the first moment they laid eyes on each other, Colton felt a spark of respect for Edward; was this how Nick Carraway felt upon meeting Jay Gatsby? The problem was that neither boy spoke to each other unless required, as Colton refused to be the first to speak, and Edward… Well, Colton could never figure what that boy was thinking. They have yet to make a conversation last longer than ten seconds.

~

Colton often thought of his brother. What would Cyrus say if he was here? Even as an adult, Cyrus would likely have the same silliness as ten-year-old him.

“Brother!” he would probably say, pouting charmingly. “You never spend any time with me, anymore. Don’t you like being at the manor?”

Or, perhaps:

“Tell me everything about these new friends of yours, Brother. Have you got a girlfriend yet? I best be the first to hear the news if you do!”

Despite all the badgering, though, Colton could not help but believe that Cyrus would be extremely, irrevocably, proud of his younger brother.

And, to Colton’s own surprise, so was he.

Fear, Forgotten: From brother to sister

Remember Colton, from a number of my stories? Yeah, for some reason, I really like using him. Probably because he’s been staying the same old nostalgic, sad guy who thinks and thinks yet never really acts on any of his thinking. He just keeps thinking about the past and about his dad, who’s been dead for several years now, and how he’ll never get over that. I’m sure he will… Eventually. It’s taking a while, mostly because 1. he has no friends and doesn’t try to get any, 2. people are scared of him, 3. he doesn’t know how to socialize properly and saw the right things based on body language/emotion, 4. he doesn’t know how to show body language/emotion himself, 5. he pushes his sister away even though he loves her, 6. he has like no hobbies, 7. he’s scared of the notion of forgetting, even if he doesn’t know it himself, 8. the list goes on.

I wrote a little poem from him to his sister Celia. When he asks Celia why she is so beautiful, it is not because he loves her romantically. He’s simply amazed as to how she can live life so purely. I would be, too. Maybe.


They come rushing back in a wave of pain,

Taught a long time ago to not show it.

Father commanded to never complain:

Even now his words affect me a bit;

But my responsibility comes first,

A job that will never be typical;

Sometimes, I think this family is cursed,

Yet, Sister, how are you so beautiful?

It is tough, when compassion seems to fail,

Especially when I try with my heart;

When people see me, they suddenly pale:

A splitting image with no brand new start;

As days pass, so do same daily routine,

So do I, you, no changes in between.

Windows, Whispers: The Rooms in the House

This one was supposed to be a character entering three rooms and looking out the window for each one. And seeing different people in each room. It ended up just being the character doing a hell lot of thinking, and not a lot of being friendly. I tried.

I also REALLY don’t know how to end a story/piece of writing/thing with a guy saying something. It just looks really unfinished. I was going for the dialogue dying out, like in movies, but that obviously did not work. Oops.


The door let out a feeble whimper as it opened, and Colton stepped in, eyes sweeping the room once over. The last time he entered this room, he was about… Eleven? Colton took a deep breath, emotions overwhelming him at barely a minute in. The image plagued his mind: rugged handsomeness in a sharp, pristine face, all line and no roundness. Greasy ducktail, as white as angel’s wings, and rigid, unkind eyes that bored into everyone.

It was impossible to look at the shimmering candlesticks, the majestic king-sized bed, the silken curtains, and the intricately decorative wallpaper for too long. The abundance of items made or painted of gold stung his eyes. Colton blinked rapidly—dust must’ve entered. Naturally, since no one has entered this room for numerous years.

He strode forward briskly, pausing before the window. It was here he stood, body still as a stick, hands rigidly fisted by his sides, face still, too afraid to drown in emotions, that he noticed something odd outside his manor. Observing the scene, his body loosened a bit. It was quite unlike what generally occurred in the manor, and Colton didn’t know if he appreciated it, or despised the damage of routine.

“Idiots,” he muttered to himself.

He couldn’t help but let a little smile find its way onto his face—making his cheeks ache. A smile; Colton hasn’t had the privilege of one for a long, long time. He had no need to. Nothing that happened in the manor really merited any reaction from Colton, except when people came to visit.

Maybe Colton was just lonely.

An tiny flame kindled somewhere in his fragmented heart, a feeling he couldn’t bear to acknowledge, so he whirled around and hastened out the room, in as graceful a manner he could muster.

~~

Colton strolled through the halls, giving a polite nod to those he passed. All these people; what did they do during the days? He never really tried to get to know them all that well, except for Master Nathaniel, of course. These thoughts invaded his mind, and before he knew it, he was standing in the entrance of the kitchens. He entered, head down, eyes scanning the floor, praying he wouldn’t be seen.

He was seen.

“Lad, ge’ some w—Oh!” a lady exclaimed, her sharp accent slurring her English, her white apron stained much like a paint palette, her hair a truss of hay, her wrinkled hands frozen in the act of wiping a counter down. “Me Lord! I—I din’ see you—Ah—Would’ya like—“

Colton eyed her. He didn’t know her name, or what she did in the kitchens.

“It’s quite alright, ma’am. I simply wished to pass by. Keep doing what you were doing.” He nodded at the rag clenched in her trembling hands; trembling out of fear of him, Colton supposed.

The lady nodded, wordlessly proceeding with her work. Colton watched her for a moment longer, and then examined the kitchens, catching no sign of windows, except—There. A miniscule square, barely enough space for one’s face, the only freedom these people had in this dark, blistering room, which was constantly buzzing with noise. Planting his face right into the square, Colton was met with an incredibly distasteful scene. He recoiled, face scrunching up, positively disgusted. Involuntarily, he backed up.

On his way out the kitchens, he passed by the lady again. The lady tensed, knowing who was approaching, but continued her diligent cleaning, head hunched over. Colton’s strides slowed a bit, and he told himself, begged himself, to say something kind to the lady.

He didn’t.

~~

Back in the halls, Colton furiously lashed out at himself. Coward, he thought. Can’t even recognize the struggles of his people. It reminded him too much of—no. He wouldn’t think. Shaking his head, he tucked a stray strand of white hair behind his ear; his mind needed to be clear and confident, his body oozing elegance and dignity.

Colton went back to his quarters. His sitting room was, however, already occupied. His sister sat there: hands folded atop her lap, face gentle and patient, as pristine and pure as ever. She was so different from him, he mused. Did they actually come from the same parents? This was a thought that lingered incessantly in the corner of his mind.

Celia stood up, a smile lifting her face. “Brother, how do you do? Oh, how I’ve missed you.”

“Sit down, Celia,” Colton instructed, drawing her in for an awkward, loose hug. Her arms enveloped around him, gripping the back of his jacket, while his hung stiffly around her.

It lasted barely a few seconds. He stepped away, fixing his clothing, and wandered over to the windows. The windows spanned nearly the whole side of the sitting room, regal, towering over Colton, screaming wealth. He stood there, hands in his pockets. From his room, he saw the scene from earlier, which amused him slightly.

A rustle behind him, and Colton knew without turning that Celia stood there. He sighed; she never listened to him.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” she remarked. “Reminds me of our younger days.”

Colton felt her gaze on him, a gaze of compassion and pity. It bore into him. He couldn’t bear it, so he spun around, took her arm, and guided them both to the couches. It had been a while since he saw her, so it was a perfect time to catch up with each other—not be nostalgic on awful memories.

“So,” Colton said, making his voice sound more thrilled than he was. “What have you been…”

Truth, Falsehood: Story of one’s life

Again, another writing thing for the course. I’m somewhat impressed by it, actually. I’ll probably look back at this next year and cringe at my terrible writing. For now, though, I don’t mind being satisfied.


She is short, yes. She is ethnically Chinese, yes. She has waterfall straight hair down to her ribcage, yes. She has hooded eyes with plain brown irises, yes. She has abnormally tiny hands and feet, yes. She is absolutely nothing special to look at.
She is Canadian through and through. Born and raised in British Columbia, she has journeyed through several phases of life.
As a preschooler, being the joyous, delightful child she was, her caretakers absolutely fawned over her. When afternoon naptime was announced daily, she would calmly amble over and doze off without any unnecessary complaints.
In kindergarten, she spun a full circle to become the class’ most disobedient, disliked brat. She strutted straight into a tight friendship of two girls to steal one half, leaving the other half lonely and companionless. Her teacher would write a brief journal entry every day. This would inform the girl’s mother of what new techniques she used that day to vex the other children.
By the end of grade one, the girl’s mother was thoroughly bent out of shape. Every week, the girl would refuse to do show and tell, even when her teacher and friends would courteously request her to present. Her mother would lock her in the laundry room for hours, desperately trying to get her to learn her lesson. She didn’t quit being her stubborn self.
Grade three came through, and she was less hardheaded. Oftentimes, she would find herself immersed in major conflicts between two of her closest friends. To avoid losing either one of them, she would recount falsehoods to one about how infuriating the other was.
The move to Vancouver from Richmond wasn’t terribly tough for her. Luckily, her teacher being new softened the blow of transferring elementary schools. On day one, she was welcomed with open arms by three fine girls, kind and good-natured. From that day on, the girl proceeded to become friends with everyone in the class and in the other French immersion class.
When grade seven graduation arrived, she knew she would likely never see her elementary school classmates again. Wanting to give everyone a parting gift, she made miniscule clay animals for each and every one of them. Throughout the year, however, she would constantly seek out attention. Many unnecessary emails and showy conversations occurred.
Entering high school, she was one of the most timid, most awkward students in her grade. People would try to get to know her; she would respond curtly and turn away. Yet, somehow, by the end of the year, she found herself immersed in a circle of friends.
Finally, grade eleven. The girl turned out to become immature, wildly spontaneous, unpredictably moody, oftentimes strangely quiet, and one of those people who can’t say “no” to any request. Her mother got mad for her lack of participation and enthusiasm in every activity she took on. Seeing only failure and loss, she found life much less exciting than she believed it to be.
There is so much in life she fears. The sight of the downturned lips, the fading twinkle in the disapproving eyes of those she has or will disappoint. The thought of dropping a note as she plays her saxophone. The image of a paper returned with a big, bold remark of “try again”. The idea of behaving the way she does at home in public and becoming the laughingstock of everyone’s day. The notion of not being of high enough standard for someone she looks up to.
Yet, somehow, she makes it through the day.
Through some unbelievable will, she drives her mind and body to stumble out of bed every morning, at 5:30. Exercise is a tedious task for her. Nonetheless, for the sake of herself, she does it.
School is a dreary place for her as well. Learning is of no use unless she has either taken an interest in the topic, or she believes it will be of use to her in the future. She does, however, look forward to seeing her role models—both of them.
Her first role model teaches her physics. He is likely the most passionate person she has and will ever meet. He can guzzle food like twenty pigs; strangely, he remains as fit and as lean as a bean. Many know him for his peculiar fondness for torturing poor cats in his physics problems, though in reality he adores cats. This girl was strongly inspired by this teacher to attempt to bring positivity and joy wherever she goes, and to develop a more powerful, more commanding sense of self-confidence.
Her second role model teaches her social studies. This teacher is one of the most well-rounded human beings she has encountered; he adores a wide range of video games, novels, movies and documentaries, sports, and many more activities. Like many, his sense of justice is incredibly potent. Unlike many, he genuinely acts upon his true sense of justice, acknowledging his biases and welcoming new outlooks, as unusual as they may be. This girl strives to be as compassionate but still as stern as him.
She has yet a long way to go.
Those two objectives may be the only two definite dreams she has for her hazy future. Naively, she is certain of her prospects in getting into a stable university and job, ignoring the harsh realities of the world. She sees herself potentially being a engineer, pragmatic and pioneering.
Why ever not? It combines many of her passions, both the newly developed ones and the lasting ones. Physics, her new favorite subject—kudos to her teacher—is a vital portion of engineering; the complex, staggering concepts never seem to fail her. It is also thanks to her interest in math that she succeeds so well in both physics and chemistry.
However, that isn’t to say she doesn’t enjoy the arts. Creating art is and will forever be one of her favorite pastimes. Ever since she was a youngster, she has loved drawing, painting, writing, singing and playing music. To this day, she sees the artwork hung up around her house and in the school gallery; tastes the flavor, the meat, of each word as she incises them deep within the pages of her notebook; hears the intense, poignant, beautifully constructed music of the school band; feels the audiences whooping and hollering, keenly cheering on the choir; proud that of the numerous activities she abandoned, she did not discard art.
This girl tries to gaze into the depths of the future, but sees nothing except mist. Which, in retrospect, is what many youth see. She may not have discovered who she truly is yet, but who ever declared that she needed to follow a certain procedure to learn about herself?
The present has no fog, no grayness. That’s where she lives.


I turn away from the mirror. But—not before shooting one last, quick look at myself, and fixing a stray strand of black hair. Uniform ironed, hair tightly wound in a bun, my brick of a backpack sitting on my back, I head for school.
Ready, set, go.